Change

I don't feel like I'm playing very well right now. My FTP roll is still $16.8ish, but not feeling the best about playing. My hourly rate, though better than some starting jobs, is in need of MUCH improvement. An hourly of $50/hr is the smallest I should be running at, in my opinion. So, anything less than that is definitely a disappointment. My game plan at the moment is, WORK FOR THE CITY! It's the job I want, and the job security I want (unless our economy keeps going to shiznit). But until then, I have some bills to pay and some debt to erase. Over two years ago, I told myself I'd pay off my student loans w/ poker money. I finally have enough, but paying that off would wipe out almost my whole bankroll--and obviously look very suspicious to the IRS. So when people say, "you should pay off your credit card now," know that I WANT to. But the ultimate goal with playing poker while not working is to invest in myself now, so that when I do decide to pay off a $5k credit card, it won't feel like I'm losing 25% of all I have. Hey, when I get to $100k, $5k will just be 5% and it won't hurt nearly as much.

Right now I'm living frugal to say the least--not buying much of anything for myslef except for food and gas. But when I finally get to where I want to be, I'll have my student loan and credit card paid off with a sizeable amount left to continue to grow. At that point I can do what I set out to do, and that's pay off the house note for Moms. But for now, not playing my A game means not earning at the hourly rate I expect to be at, and that's a problem.